Bet You Thought That Cricket Ate Me Alive...

But, no, I did make it downstairs past the cricket to coveted beer. Then I don't know what happened, but blogging left me.

Could it have been my lack of inspiration keeping me from posting? Was nothing worth mentioning happening in my life? Was it my time restraints? I do love an afternoon of bon-bons and soaps...

No, I have to come clean...it's me and my damned self esteem. Every day I'm reading all these great blogs, sometimes about fun and simple things, sometimes about deeper issues, whatever the subject they were all funny, moving, uplifting, etc. And I wasn't cuttin' it so I stopped.

But before we get ahead of ourselves, I haven't turned over a new leaf. My blog posts will still be bland and uninspiring, but I'm gonna give it another try. If for no other reason than to share this with you, my faithful reader(s):

These are the 2 things on my 4-year-old son's Christmas list:

Ipod

Smooth Away

Should I be concerned??

Just another reason...

...why I hate it when my husband travels...

There's one of these on my basement steps:

In theory, not really a big deal. In reality, it's the only thing standing between me and this...

Anyone want to come over and kill it so I can have a beer?? I'll give you one too!!

Letters & Binkies...

Well, my faithful reader(s), I'm back. You may be wondering where I've been all this time, but I can't tell you because then I'd have to kill you. Or you could just assume that nothing exciting has happened since Chris Martin was sweating on me. Go with your gut on that one.

I should be posting about the end of summer nostalgia, or having my youngest child in pre-school, leaving me with 2 mornings of childless quiet and laundry. But, no, I'm moving on to more monumental happenings.

My mom came to visit this week, meaning big things would happen. My mom is able to accomplish all those tasks that I am too emotionally and physically drained to do myself, even though they do fall under my job title as "mother". Usually these include jobs like organizing, or putting off-season clothes away, or even (gasp) cleaning out the fridge.

This week though, we went monumental. Mom decided to...(drumroll)...

Teach my four year old the alphabet

Wean said four year old from pacifier

Here's the standings...

We can now spell our name and identify most of the letters:

These are in the trash:

And we're riding around on these new wheels "purchased" (used, of course) with the pacifiers:


I put my mom on the train this morning and miss her already. Luckily I'll see her Sunday...maybe she'll help me put the summer clothes away and prepare for fall...

Mudstock 2009

First, let me set the scene...



This to our left:



This directly behind us:



This directly beneath us:



And this directly in front of us. And I do mean directly:




Our tickets included entry into all of the limited access areas all day -- air conditioned tents, catered meals, all the water we needed, and the pit. We were in the front row of the pit for Elbow, Echo and the Bunnymen and Coldplay. It was absolutely unbelievable, we could see every bead of sweat coming from Chris Martin, and boy can that man move. They played so many great tunes, including a beautiful MJ tribute of Billie Jean. Here's some more shots:











Will handed the guard in front of us his drumstick, and he gave it to this little guy standing right next to us, it was incredible:



I loved every single second of it. And then we went back to the hotel and soaked all the crazy mud out from between our toes!

Indulgence...

...just another reason why I adore my husband...he indulges me. Different than being spoiled, being indulged is supporting my likes and allowing my whims. He indulges my shopping sprees (which includes girls weekends away to shop); he indulges my hobbies (like scrapbooking, which also includes a girls weekend away); he indulges my blogging (no away weekend yet, but he does answer all my tech questions!)

This weekend, during a silent auction/benefit in memory of a friend of ours, he indulged me yet again, by bidding, and continuing to outbid others, for VIP tickets to Coldplay, one of my favs. And I consider it an indulgence, not only because I've recently seen the band, but also because this time it's not that close by, and it's an all day concert, requiring logistics, babysitters, and more money we don't have. And he will do it, all with an easy smile on his face and a carefree attitude, because he indulges.




So I waited for you
What wouldn't I do?
And I'm covered, it's true
I'm covered in you.
If I ever want proof
I find it in you.
Yea I honestly do
In you I find proof.

Thanks J, I love you that much.

Friday Fun with Naughty Governors

Here's a little fun for your Friday...play Where's the Naughty Governor Game, where you try to find, what else, politicians with a wandering eye (and other body parts...). Like Where's Waldo, the 5 games have you searching for clues in a photograph before trying to locate the missing politician's face. The game features Sanford, McGreevey, Spitzer, and Edwards. And a special appearance by Palin...enjoy!!

http://www.addictinggames.com/wheresthenaughtygovernor.html

Heaven Forbid

OK so a few weeks back I blogged about my son's questions regarding legos in heaven. I am at this moment speaking to one of my dearest friends and she is relaying to me her children's questions about heaven and the afterlife....they went something like this:

Her 5 year old son would like to know: "Mom, does God wear clothes in heaven? Or do his privates just hang out?"

Hmmm, how do you answer that one....

Her 4 year old daughter, who calls heaven "kevin", asked this about friends' pets that recently passed: "Are Guinness (100 lb black lab) and Spunky (15 year old decrepit dead cat) friends in Kevin?"

How about you, any fun questions from your children regarding heaven, and what's in fashion there?

Lest you think...

...that all we did on the 4th of July was fall out of fire trucks, here's a recap:

Parade:

Previously-mentioned fire truck:

Hot dogs:

Helicopter landing and learning:

Bickering over pinwheels:

Cupcake decorating:



And sparklers, both on and off the cupcakes:



We were short one parent and one child, due to Scout camp, and we couldn't go to the pool due to surgery recovery on our 3-year-old. So it was an unconventional 4th for us, but a fun one!

Do You Know this Person?

She's a friend, an acquaintance, really. And she has, let's just say, a "different" parenting approach. A little more hands on than, say, you or me. And doesn't it seem as though every time you are in her company one of your kids uses potty language, or cries, or something really lame that normally wouldn't involve you at all, but with this person you feel like an inept parent. Perhaps this acquaintance even told you once that "your parenting skills are out of whack" (while waving a finger in your face).

I'm pretty sure all of us moms have someone like this in their world. I saw mine today at the 4th of July parade and immediately cringed internally, taking a quick look around to make sure all of my kids were accounted for. Yep everyone in tow, I think, sighing in relief.

Not so fast...just then the baby takes a tumble out of the fire truck onto her head. Oops.

Oh well, no blood no foul...

I have to ask...

Does anyone (or maybe everyone??) think that Gov. Sanford's responses to his affair are completely ridiculous? Consider these quotes:

Governor Mark Sanford told the Associated Press earlier today that Maria Belen Chapur “is his soul mate.“ So, for the second time in less than a week, the Governor of South Carolina boldly, unapologetically, publicly declares his devotion to a woman other than his wife.

“This was a whole lot more than a simple affair; this was a love story,” he told The A.P. “A forbidden one, a tragic one, but a love story at the end of the day.”

"It began very innocently, as I suspect many of these things do, in just a casual email back and forth, and advice on one's life there, an advice here. But here, recently over this last year, developed into something much more than that."

Can he seriously believe that these responses will sit well with America, especially women? Is it not enough that he cheated on his wife, now he tells the world that he is in love with his cohort (read: HO), and is trying to "fall back in love" with his wife.

Jenny, tell him not to bother.

Sundays are for Sharing...

And I'd like to share this with you...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj-x9ygQEGA&feature=player_embedded

If you can stand it, watch until the end, I thought it was the funniest part. Thanks Sheila!

I Will Survive, Hey Hey...

OK, I survived the first day of summer vacation. Well, it wasn't really the first day, since two kids still had a 1/2 day. But I worked, helped with the teacher luncheon, took the kids to the pool, cooked dinner, and, well, blogged! And all the kids are still alive and I didn't take any controlled substances. I call that a success. Only 71 days to go. And remember a few weeks ago when I was saying I just wanted to relax this summer, no schedules, no camps, just "be"? Yea, I'm rethinking that decision...

Early Morning Excitement

We had some early morning excitement here today. Now that the incessant rain has finally stopped (for the day, anyway) we were able to have "the tree man" come and remove a tree that fell over in our yard last week. He arrived at 7:20 a.m.

As you can see, the critters that had not yet left for school were watching. It was better than TV, which of course is not allowed on in the morning...

I'm so happy it's not raining, I felt like I was living in Forks without the Cullens...dreary indeed.

True Colors

Today was move up day at school, where each grade visits the teachers and classrooms for the next grade up. My kindergarten son visited 1st grade, where he decided he wanted the same teacher his big brother had in 1st grade. She's a lovely woman, who happens to be African American. While telling me about move up day he asked about skin color, and since he is pale, pale and I am a product of the 70s "baby oil/Bruce album covered with tin foil" school of sunscreen I was able to point out how our skin color differs and go from there.

He then looked at himself in the mirror and said "Well, my face is freckled, but my arms are plaid."

That's right, my freckled/plaid/1st grader to be!

I'm High...

...on Wet Swiffer fumes. I must be high or I would never admit this....

Yes, it took 4 wet swiffer pads to clean my kitchen floor, which is quite frankly not much larger than a galley kitchen. I wish I had a good excuse for my lack of housecleaning skills, but I doubt blogging and fanfic would excuse that kind of dirt. And apparently I don't really care, since I'm blogging about it!

Oh well, Happy Memorial Day everyone!

Happy Mother's Day!

I'll be taking the advice of one of my oldest BFF's and limiting my Mother's Day celebration to just one glass of wine. Thanks Cassie, your advice is always sound, and I love you!

And thanks to all the great moms I am lucky enough to call my friends -- thanks for always being able to talk me off whatever ledge I'm on; thanks for listening when my kids won't; thanks for showing me by example the way to be a great mom; thanks for teaching me how to face hardship with grace and dignity. You guys know who you are, and I love each of you.

Last night I had the pleasure of being with some of the most extraordinary moms I know -- my cousins and my aunt. Their daughters are teens now, and I can only hope that my children are as socially graceful, well-spoken and polite when they are in their teens as these girls are.

And even though my mom doesn't know what a blog is, so will most likely never read this, I of course will mention her, the best mom I know. She showed me, throughout my whole life, what it is to be a remarkable woman. I want to grow up to be just like her.

So, I'm off to start drinking my wine, and I wish all these great moms a very Happy Mother's Day. I'm sure all of our husbands and children have already shopped for us, and will be presenting us with some beautiful new bauble tomorrow, after they let us sleep in and bring us breakfast in bed...or not.

Happy Mother's Day!

Doubting Thomas...From Me No Less!

Even though I feel as though I have a very strong and deep faith, I rarely share its impact on my life. But I had to share this tidbit...and for those of you who know me personally, you can now pick yourself up off the floor...

The readings at mass yesterday were about Jesus' rising, and one dealt with Thomas and his doubt.

The priest said this: "Everyone knows, Thomas gets a bad rap for doubting. But I don't believe that there's anyone here who has never doubted their faith, who has never questioned something about our faith. And how could you not? Because once you experience the dark, when you do see the light it will shine even brighter."

He went on to explain Thomas' words once he did see the light "My Lord, and My God" which is what we were taught to say during the consecration. The revelation each time, the light after the darkness that shines so much brighter and brings us home with the sigh, My Lord, and My God.

I have some friends experiencing some dark times right now, and I was there a few short years ago when my brother was battling cancer. So these thoughts yesterday spoke to me louder than perhaps they would have before. I know that the light is brighter for me now, now that my little brother is cured of the evil disease that coursed through his body. And even though we're all the same people, I'd like to think that, because I experienced that darkness, I see the light more clearly, and that I am able to see it shine brighter.

Not only because he is better, although that makes the light really, really bright; but also because of the light that shone during the darkness itself. The light of friends and relatives who were there for us at a very dark time; the light of strength that we didn't even know we possessed; and the light of self-reflection that the darkness insisted.

I remember my mom's dear friend, who has an incredibly deep faith, calling me back then. I was so sad talking to her, and I finally admitted that I was having trouble praying. I was so ashamed. I didn't know what to pray for, because the only thing I wanted was for my brother to get better. I couldn't, I wouldn't pray for strength, or for God's will be done, or anything like that. There was only one acceptable thing for me -- remission, and it felt so selfish, so I didn't pray. And she said to me "That's what we're here for, we'll pray for you." Again, the light in the darkness.

And for now I can sit at mass, and say "My Lord, and My God," and bask in that light. And for at least the time being I can be the person offering the light and the strength to the ones I love who are in a dark place, and hopefully help bring them home.

Out of the Mouths of Babes...

Yesterday my 5yo says

"Mom, when you go to heaven, are you standing or laying down?"

"I don't know, I think standing?"

"OK. And do they have Legos there?"

"I'm sure they do honey."

"If you get there first you won't play with them will you? You always break them."

"Yea, no, OK I won't play with heaven's Legos if I get there first."

Then last night, my 3yo son says this:

"I want to go to New York and be a queen."

I'm pretty sure he was thinking Cinderella, but either way it should be interesting.

Thankful...and Mutilated Chocolate

First of all, thank you to all of blogosphere for talking me off the ledge with my 7yo. I appreciate your kinds words, suggestions, and book recommendations. I took all of the advice, and although he doesn't have the Legos back yet, he's definitely been watching his behavior. I have been able to point out, calmly, each time he starts to fall back into the "I don't care" yelling mode, and I say, "this is the type of thing that has to stop before you get the Legos back". So far so good, thank you all again!

So, on to bigger and better parenting problems, specifically those associated with being a holiday superhero.

Knowing that today was the last day of school before break, and knowing that the Easter Bunny would not want to take 5 kids "shopping" for Easter candy, I did it yesterday. Shopped for all the Easter necessities and candy needed, and just stuffed into the back of the minivan. Where it sat until this afternoon, when it suddenly dawned on me that it was warm. For the first time in like a gajillion days, it was sunny...you know where I'm going with this, don't you...

Just in case the photo isn't clear, I did not purchase mutilated bunnies with sunken eyes. The good news is, I'm not a waster, so I'll have to eat the chocolate myself. Bummer!!

The Grinch that Stole Legos

OK, I could use some parenting advice here...

We struggle with our 7yo son...he is a wonderful child in so many ways, but he has always, always, been stubborn and headstrong beyond what we can easily deal with. Many times I think of him as just needing more "control" over things than most kids. So we try really hard to give him control wherever we can.

But lately it isn't enough for him. Mostly it comes down to homework and chores around the house. This weekend was no exception. And it ended on a bad note last night.

Our kids are still young enough that we have a simple evening routine - dinner, bath/shower, independent reading, being read to, lights out. Always the same. Last night our boys were playing with brand new Legos right before dinner, and as a treat we let them go back to playing Legos after dinner. After about 1/2 an hour we got them all upstairs and into the shower.

We told out 7yo that it was time for him to either read or work on his project (he has a project, a big one, due tomorrow at school and won't start it. I'm letting the chips fall where they may on that one, making it his responsibility when it's not ready tomorrow) Anyway, we got one of his famous tantrums, and screaming "NO! I'm playing LEGOS!!" I calmly told him if he didn't do his reading/project for 15 minutes I would take his Legos away today. He said he didn't care.

So, I took every friggin' Lego out of his room this morning. Packed them in big boxes and put them in the attic. But I felt horrible doing it, and I don't know what to do. I want to say to him, until you show me that you can handle your other responsibilities -- homework and reading in particular -- I keep the Legos.

But then I struggle. I hate the homework. I think a 7 year old that spends 7 of 12 waking hours in school should not have to do more at home. But, he does have to, and that's just life. How can I be understanding and firm at the same time? How can I stress the importance of independent reading and still give him freedom? I hate the threats, and the tough love, but I can't figure out how to get through to him, to let him know that some things aren't negotiable.

Any thoughts?

The Trap Was Set...

Last night, our 3 oldest boys set this elaborate Leprechaun trap, hoping to lure the wee one in with promises of a Leprechaun Amusement Park. The Park held the excitement of several Lego vehicles for the lucky green guy to play with...

But, alas, that Leprechaun somehow got the Lego man inside to hold the box up for him while he escaped!

But not without leaving a trail of treats!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Hereforwith I Shall be Called...

PENTAMOM...cousin Sheila suggested it. I'm jumping on the bandwagon, and claiming this as my own before anyone else calls it.

And to celebrate my new name, please watch the following:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKdutIhvQ28

Stuck at the Mall...

I'm giving a whole new meaning to being stuck at the mall...

I never go to the mall, but had to yesterday for the Disney store. So in I drove, into the parking garage, where there's a 6' clearance. No problem. Unless...

you have one of these on the top of your car from the family ski trip this past weekend...




Then you are, literally, stuck at the mall.

Luckily Rob was able to come help...

The trouble with reading...

...is if your husband asks you to help set up his facebook page and he gives you his password, and you happen to be reading Twilight (again) you may take the liberty of putting this picture in as his profile picture:

Nothin' wrong with a little Pattinson/Cullen, is there? mmm, mmm, mmm

Crackbook Jealousy

So, as if feeling self-conscious about my "blogless blog" wasn't enough, I just logged onto Facebook, and took a perusal over to my little brother's facebook page. See, he just joined Crackbook, like a week ago. I wanted to see how he was making out, if he was making friends, see if he needed any big-sisterly help, maybe a few friend referrals.

The brat has 283 friends. Already.

So, of course I had to go through all the friends I have, and see if there was anyone on their lists that weren't on mine so I could beef up my friend list a little. I got a few more, but he is still kicking my ass! And what is up with my competitive craziness, on facebook no less! I'm losing it...I'd better go read Twilight for the 10th time...

Happy Heart Day!!

In honor of Valentine's Day (and because I have nothing going on in my life to blog about!) I am posting this picture of the Lego heart my 7yo son made me for my birthday last week. How incredibly sweet is that??

Happy Valentine's Day!

Humbled

This afternoon DH and I took our 3 oldest sons (10, 7 and 5) to see a children's play at a downtown theatre. It was, as always with this theatre, an amazing production. In the lobby afterward, as the other 200 children relished the chance to meet the characters in the play, or just simply put on their coats and readied to leave, looking all angelic, my sons played smackdown with the rolled up posters provided by the theatre.

Exasperated, I announced as we got in the car that we were not going to dinner, that children who couldn't keep their hands to themselves could not be trusted in a restaurant. Of course this was followed by cries and pleas "we will, we promise, please, please, we want to go out to dinner!!" So I said we would go, but if they didn't behave we would leave and they would have to reimburse us for dinner with money from their Disney savings (I can't tell you how many times I just typed that sentence and then deleted it out of utter embarrassment. But there it is, a shining parental moment for all of blogosphere to see).

At the restaurant we are seated next to another family with grown children. I am facing the grown son, who has disabilities. In fact, I am the only one in my family who can clearly see everyone at that table. Every few minutes he has a loud outburst, but he's not disruptive, he just is who he is. And every few minutes his mother reaches over and gently wipes his face with the napkin.

And smugly I think, I am so blessed.

But later, during my Sunday night insomnia (I can never sleep on Sunday nights, a whole 'nother post) I replay the evening over and over again. How incredibly smug, how unbelievably arrogant I was as I sat there watching my boys color and "behave". I am blessed, don't get me wrong. But so was that mother. She was also humble. And graceful. And respectful.

When will I be that mother, the one who takes in stride her child being a child, and merely gently wipes her child's face when needed?

Very Funny Friday...

It's not a far jump from blogger to carnie, apparently. so here I go, I'm going to try Sue's carnival from http://borrowedlight.blogspot.com.

You can laugh, at me, right here since it's obvious I don't know how to seamlessly add the link into my blog post.

Or you can choose to torture yourself further and see if this is a Very Funny Friday, or just "Something I Thought Was Funny on Thursday":

I went to dinner with my 5 cousins last night. They are like sisters to me, and our times together are always filled with laughter -- the kind of laughter that makes you cry, and snort.

Last night was a celebration of sorts. A ta-ta ta-tas party we called it since one cousin is going in for a breast reduction on Monday. And while she's at it a quick tummy tuck, really just so she's proportioned -- I mean who wants perky boobs and a baby gut?

On her home calendar she writes "teeth surgery". Here's the ensuing conversation between she and her 16-year-old son:

Son: "What are you having done again"

Mom: "I am having my breast reduced (audible gasp and cringe from son) and a tummy tuck"

Son: "What's a tummy tuck?"

Mom: "It's when they suction all the fat out"

Son: "So when it's over, will you be taller?"

Mom: "Um. Taller? No, I won't be taller, I'll just be thinner."

Son: "I don't understand how you won't be taller."

Mom: "I don't understand what makes you think I'll be taller..."

Maybe you had to be there, but I just thought that was guffaw-worthy...and if you didn't, how about this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DYBYjM7nMoA

That makes me guffaw, and boost my self-confidence.

Why I Work

I work as a marketing/communications consultant, about 10-12 hours/week over 2 days. I mostly work out of my home office and have had the same wonderful, beautiful, mother-of-full-grown children watching mine while I work for all these years. Why do I work, you ask? Could it be the cold hard cash? How about the ability to interact with adults? Using my brain for something other than ring-around-the-rosy? Nope, none of the above.

I work because every week Betsy takes my piles of clean laundry from this:

to this:

And that rocks!!

Chicken Scratch

Yesterday we received a note from my son's 2nd grade teacher. Apparently the students were to journal about what they would do if they were "stuck at home." The teacher's instructions apparently included that they could be silly. Here's what my son came up with...


What do you mean you can't read it?

Clearly though, it says the word 'fart', which, apparently, is inappropriate. So, um, does that mean the teacher is not concerned with the fact that my 2nd grader writes like a chicken?? And also cannot spell. Well, he can spell fart, Lego, and Wii. Yep, that's my chicken. I mean son.

I'm a Little Bit Country, I'm a Little Bit Rock N Roll...

So I suffer from split blog personality. Haven't heard of it? The medical term is blogophrenia, and I am a sufferer.

I read hysterically funny mom blogs, ones that make me laugh out loud. I think, hey, I'm funny. Yet I can't seem to come up with a funny post.

I read very spiritual mom blogs, ones that inspire me. I think, hey, I'm spiritual. Yet I have nothing to inspire my reader (yes, that's singular on purpose).

I read fabulous mom blogs that remind me how much I cherish this time with my children. I think, hey, I'm a good mom. Yet I have no clever way to share my parenting advice, if it's even worth sharing. Then I think hey, I've used the word 'hey' far too many times for one blog post.

Then there's the blogs that I can't compete with at all -- those of very crafty moms who can recover a chair, while scrapbooking. I have scrapbook stuff, and chairs, but that's as close as I come. And the blogs of mom's who love to cook and are very good at it (that's you my one blog reader). I have trouble with boxed brownies.

But I like all these things, and I try them all in real life! Is that enough -- to try to be funny, spiritual, clever, crafty and a good cook...or should I stick with one thing and make it my own?

Maybe for 2009 I will work on liking and appreciating my blog self just as I am -- a little bit country, and a little bit rock n roll, and a little bit r&b, and a little bit gospel, and a little bit adult alternative...

While I was using the bathroom...

...my baby daughter opened and ate an entire bag of Hershey's Kissables. All that was left was a blue puddle of drool on the kitchen floor.

Norman Rockwell has left the building...

For the past several years we have spent New Year's Eve as a family, just DH, myself and the 5 critters. We have dinner, then play board games, then we gorge ourselves on chocolate fondue and sparkling cider (the real stuff for me and DH). Last night was no exception. We looked forward to it all day, each child picked a board game of their choice, I prepared the fondue dips.

It was very Norman Rockwell-ian.

Until it wasn't.

Oldest son's game of choice was missing an integral piece, and choosing another game? Well, I may as well have suggested he do homework. Critter #2 and critter #3 argued over who won more games of Zingo. Critter #4 only wanted checkers, not understanding why everyone couldn't play. The pokemon DVD board game fell apart when someone pushed the wrong button on the remote. Everyone cried at least once.

So we gently ended the evening, without having a chance to discuss resolutions, and put everyone to bed. More tears. More whining. My resolution became "next year I'm renting the children from the Pottery Barn catalogue for the holidays, they're never fighting!"

Then DH and I decided we would have another glass of bubbly and watch a lighthearted romantic movie. Notsomuch...I picked P.S. I Love You. Shoulda watched the preview, since it's a really sad movie and cried through most of it...

The good news? The edges of last night's memories have softened, DH said this morning "it wasn't too bad." And the kids are already asking when we can have another fondue/game night...maybe by 2010 I'll remember it fondly too!

Happy New Year!!!